Asking for help to stop drinking

Asking for help to stop drinking is not easy but it's crucial if you want to get and stay sober.

I’ve stopped drinking alcohol so many times. If I was to count every morning that I’ve woken up, swearing that today’s the day I stop for good, it would probably be hundreds, if not thousands of days.

And yet here I am again, still drinking, still full of shame and remorse, and hungover.

I want alcohol out of my life, for good. I have grown to hate drinking - there’s little-to-no pleasure in it anymore - but I also don’t know how to be without it. I need to know how to ask for help to stop drinking.

I’m truly stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can’t live with alcohol and I can’t live without it.

I’m truly stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can’t live with alcohol, and I can’t live without it. It feels like I’ve tried everything to stop drinking. I’ve joined a gym, taken up running, started a creative writing class and even went back to the church I attended as a child. None of it worked.

I left a partner who drank more than me, I changed jobs and moved house. My problem stayed with me. I became a mother and managed to stay alcohol-free during the pregnancy. Three weeks after my baby was born, I was drinking again. I couldn’t stop.

Decades later, I’ve only gone backwards. My career is in tatters, my relationships have fractured and my health is poor. I’m broke. I’m unreliable and I hate myself. The only thing I am really consistent about is drinking., way too much, all the time.

It’s my secret, this problem, although I know some people must have noticed it. They might have guessed I drink too much, despite the great lengths I go to to conceal it. But no one really knows how mad I’ve become, how this substance has taken over my mind, body and soul.

Keeping secrets is hard.

I’m so scared to do it but I’m more scared about what will happen if I keep drinking.

The only thing left for me now is to tell someone. Maybe I need to ask for help?

Asking for help to stop drinking

The thought of asking for help makes me feel ill and shakes me to my core. If I admit I can’t do this on my own, it means revealing what I’ve worked so hard to hide for so long. It also means I will have to stop drinking, and I don’t know how to do that. Asking for help to stop drinking was the last thing I wanted to do.

I keep seeing things about people getting sober though, so maybe they are signs? I can’t stop thinking about this. Maybe it’s time to ask for help and really turn this ship around? I feel like it’s the only thing left for me. I’m so scared to do it but I’m more scared about what will happen if I keep drinking. I’m not sure I will survive.

Knowing this had become a life and death situation was what finally drove me to ask for help to stop drinking. I had finally made the decision that I needed help, and I couldn't go it on my own. I needed something way more powerful than just me to get out of this mess.

After I'd come to the realisation, the next steps were easy - sending a text to a friend who I knew understood and who could help. That led to a phone call, and then another call to a professional who could help. The door to sobriety has been opened, and I all I had to do was walk through it.

*The author of this Sober Story is now in long-term recovery.

Listen to the Who Do I Talk To About Addiction episode of the Ocean Hills podcast Addicted To Recovery.

ATR Who do I talk to about addiction_

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If you're worried about your drinking or that of someone you love, give Elaine a call on 027 573 7744 for a confidential chat or contact us here.